


Bittersweet Memories

by MorganasCrow



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Cigars, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-05
Updated: 2015-09-05
Packaged: 2018-04-19 06:26:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4735835
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MorganasCrow/pseuds/MorganasCrow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Morgana tries to deal with Morgause's demise.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bittersweet Memories

**Author's Note:**

> The title comes from the Bullet For My Valentine's song.

"Memories sharp as daggers"  
\- H.I.M. (Killing Loneliness)

Morgana sat down onto the swinging chair on her door yard and fixed the horizon with her eyes. She had just entombed her love... now she was trying to drown her sorrows. She was slowly swinging her head as she was drinking her glass of the finest irish whiskey. Bushmills black, single barell, 25 years old. She cherished it for more than seven years - she wanted to save it for their tenth anniversary. Instead... Morgana's eyes filled with bitter tears tears of grief which started to drop into her glass. Morgana bottomed her glass up and opened a wooden box resting on her lap. Montearto Churchill oscuro. Ones of the finest cigars you can get. Morgana incinerated one and deeply inhaled the smoke, which you are not supposed to do. Her lungs hurted, but she resisted to cough, greeting the pain. When the pang became unbearable, she exhaled. She wanted to torture herself, hoping the physical agony would allevitate her emotional suffering.  
How did they meet actually? She was walking on the meadow when some bastards cornered her and threatened to rape her. She remembers being hit and dropping on the ground. When she gained consciousness again, she was laying in the bed with Morgause's face veiled with gold above her head. Like if it was some cheap novel, she always thought.  
They had spent seventeen wonderful months together. That means five hundred and twelve days to be punctual. Only twelve thousand two hundred and seventy five hours of mutual time. And they were ready to seal their bound with a marriage. And it was the day which was supposed to be their happiest that turned into Morgana's darkest nightmare.  
Morgana finished the bottle and threw the butt end away. Immediately she lit another Montearto up and took a bottle of Dunphy's irish, fifteen years old. She was trying to forget or to ease the pain at least. She was trying to forsake her lacerated memories, but she couldn't. Everything was crystal clear - like if her memory turned into a movie screen. It was their wedding day. They had been driven - separatelly - towards the temple. None of them wore a tux - they both were wearing beautiful dress - Morgana black with a posie of white roses, Morgause vice versa. But they never arrived there. Morgause's car got hit frontally. Her seatbelt failed and she was ejected onto the road. Everything went black before she even closed her eyes - Morgause was dead on the spot. When Morgana's limo arrived, she ran out before it even stopped. She remembered kneeling in the pouring rain, swaying Morgause's motionless head growing marble cold on her knees.  
Morgana bottomed her shot up - she had just finished her second bottle. Now she took the finest tequilla - 21 years old - and unpacked another box of Churchill's. Her breast started to shake with fits of cough, but her lips were smiling. I'll see you soon, my love, she thought. The black horses had ridden Morgause laying on the roses... ridden her somewhere over the rainbow. And now they will bring this flowerbed for me. Morgana coughed some blood. This girl has cried so hard.  
And this morning Morgana buried Morgause. She was trying to drown her sorrow in alcohol and tobacco. She had almost grown numb. She coughed some blood. Then she started to hyperventilate. And then the gleam in her eye slowly died away.

"Would you die tonight for love?  
Baby, join me in death."  
\- H. I. M. (Join Me In Death)

**Author's Note:**

> I saw this story (with different characters) in my dreams which kept returning to me for like half a year when I was at the elementary school.


End file.
